Failure is not my friend

So paying off our debt is going badly. I accidentally spent too much money. Again. But I did resist buying a new 360. And a new TV. And I noticed my credit limit increased. And I paid my bills. As well as our bills for the month. And we are set for rent at the end of the month. But...I should have put more towards Mark's Visa...that bastard card with a 20% interest costing us $100 a month in bullshit. There's a super short TV show that comes on at night called "Til Debt do Us Part" with this woman who goes hardcore on couples and helps them straighten their debt. Granted these people have years and years on thousands of debt, she gives them several thousands of dollars for paying off the debt. If only she would give us the $5k. We'd practically be out of debt! But alas, the world doesn't work like that.

Ive felt like crap for the last week or so. Sick. My stomach hurts. My eye hurts and keeps panging in pain. The whole day during my birthday I had terrible stomach pains. I couldn't keep my stomach from feeling this dull throbbing ache.

Exercise is going well. Mark has lost 40lbs and his before and after pictures are crazy! He didn't believe the difference. He would always laugh at me when I called him skinny. Jerk. But sorry no pictures yet! He wont let me share. He wants to surprise everyone for Otakon. I still havent budged the scale...which isnt really affecting me. Not yet at least. But Im so proud of the way he works out, Anthony, our friend and personal trainer, really pushes Mark to his limit. And Mark never gives up, he grunts and growls but never quits.

A certain someone is looking for a house. Im excited for her. This also means that another certain someone would be moving in with her. I wonder what our future will hold for us. Will we get our own apartment? Our own house? Move back to MD?

Speaking of MD. I WANT TO COME HOME. Yep. Still do. Sorry TX. You are awesome. But I don't feel at home here. This isn't where I belong. I'm crossing my fingers for January. Ive made myself hold back about talking about it with Mark until after Otakon. I feel like a lawyer building my case. Collecting the evidence to present my side of the story. So to our friends out there who read this! Do your best when we visit to remind Mark what we left, WHO we left. And how much you guys miss us and make us happy. And we also should be looking for possible roommates. Maybe.

So our big birthday bash is friday. Wish us luck on our first TX party! Sorry this is late/short. Im running out the door to go see Eclipse! The third movie from the Twilight series. Adios.

Im not too close with Death

I cried at work today. Alot. I had a customer handed off to me from my manager. The first thing she says to me is "Im just gonna tell you straight. Im dying from cancer soon" Now I had noticed her lack of hair and the cute wrap she used to conceal her head. But now I noticed the huge lesions on her skin, decaying and trying to heal. "I want to make videos for my funeral and children to remember me from" I instantly thought of my grandmother. Thats alot of videos. I helped her find an inexpensive camera with plenty of memory. I ring her up and she uses her best buy card. "You have 18 months no interest financing" I say after thinking. I knew she wouldn't be around that long. My eyes teared up as she looked at me thanked me for the camera and I told her good luck. I immediately tuned to my store manager and general manager who were a few feet away. Unable to talk I just cried in front of them and managed to ask for 10 minutes to calm down. I realized that I haven't been close to death recently. And I have never known anyone who was dying from cancer. I wanted to hug the woman comfort her, but I didn't want her to mistake me for pitying her. I wasnt pitying her. I knew she was prepared for death. I'm so sensitive. My store manager came up to me afterwards and I apologized for being so sensitive. He told me not too, he said the world needs more people who are compassionate like me and can understand and connect with people. He said he wishes he were more like me.

In happier news. Ive decided to listen to an entire series on audio book. The Sword of Truth by Terry Goodkind. It is a wicked awesome fantasy series. I couldnt put it down before and I cant now! It keeps my mind busy instead of worrying and thinking about things that don't matter.

Mark and I have been working out lately. Lots of stomach and arm exercises! Ive lost 2 more pounds. Mark is down another pound. If I lose 2 pounds a week Ill be down 14 pounds by Otakon. I need to start my costume soon. Im so excited. Id like to tan a little more too.

Mark and I are doing great. Still no big arguments. Our debt is slowly shrinking. I want another kitty. There's a white one across the street with red eyes. Mark said no. Although I know he secretly wants one, he said Blair cat was lonely a few months ago. Matt's supposed to be getting his Corgi in august. That will be $300 for me, since I had to pay $600 for Blair ($400 non-refunable pet fee, $200 deposit)

How is everyone else doing? Its getting terribly hot here. Matt said our blood will start to thin and adapt. I think his blood is adapting. Mine is just retarded I guess. Sigh. I want snow.....

One day at a time....

Im really excited for my birthday in a few weeks. Ive got very little money saved up for my camera but Im keeping my fingers crossed. I only techincally need $400 and if Mark, Matt and I put some together, that might be like $250 or something. So $150 isnt bad! My hope is to buy it before Otakon!

We are also throwing a birthday party for Mark and I on July 2 (his birthday) at our place. Im kinda interested in how it will turn out since this is the first party we will have here and TX is a different type of crowd. Lets keep our fingers crossed.

I am so excited about going home in 2 months. Now Ill only get to see Mom for a little bit but I will have to deal. Maybe Ill go see her on sunday too. I have to get started making my costume as well which is going to hinder the paying of the bills but I have confidence that I can manage my money.

I dyed my hair again, it was supposed to be chocolate brown but instead turned out blackberry-ish. Its really dark with a purple tint. Oh well.

So I started working out with my friend Anthony at work. He's kinda my personal trainer. Hes kicking my ass. We work out Mon-Fri at 10p. But on thrus he canceled and friday I had plans. So 3 nights of hell werent so bad. Tomorrow starts week 2! He said he can already see improvements. I need this and I can do it. Ill keep you guys updated of any changes!

So after the attack of interest from Bank of America Mark and I have paid $406 of our debt off. On friday he should be able to pay another 100, then Ill pay 150ish and then he should pay 200ish. Lets hope!

So Ive always been interested in geocaching but Ive never pursued it. But recently Brian and I have been making little cache hunting trips. ITS AWESOME. What is it? Geocaching is like treasure hunting. People all over hide little 'caches' in light poles, in caves, in trees, under rocks EVERYWHERE. And they write the coordinates on the website and a description or story. Then people find them with their gps or iphones. When you find it you make a log on the website and sign the cache and date it. Then you hide it where you found it. Mark has even been going with me!

So I think thats it, I wasnt planning on writing much oh well. Love you all! <3